Year 2

I hate April. I know hate is a strong word, but I do. Once the month ticks to May, relief washes over me and I think, I made it through the 22nd year. I have only enjoyed 12 April's in my entire life. There are good things that have happened in April. But for me personally, April is hard. And harder since my grandma passed away. Today marks the 2 years since my precious grandma left. Year 2 was a lot quieter. I haven't talked to anyone today about my grandma, because if we are honest, only a select few know that today is the 2 year anniversary of her death. That is okay, I admittedly don't remember when my aunt died or when my cousin died, but I know the 9th and 12th of April, because those two dates effect me more than any other days in my life. I sometimes wonder how 2 years has passed so quickly and other times I feel like I just talked to her. I think of my grandma all the time. And I see my grandma everywhere. When I see her car or when I see sunflowers, I instantly think, GG and smile. Sometimes as I am praying, I ask God to let her know I will never forget her. I miss her so much, that it's impossible to describe. I miss having her guidance and I miss feeling loved by her.  As much as I miss her, I know where she is and I know she is the happiest she has ever been. I know that someday, I will see her again and for now, I can continue to remember how amazing she was and how much of her I have in me. GG you loved me from the day I was born and I was always your child. You believed in me when I didn't even have the faith to believe in myself. You loved me enough to make church a priority and for that I am beyond thankful because of you, I have a personal relationship with Christ, I am a child of God, just as you are, GG, and I will see you again. I am blessed to have had my grandma in my life and while she is not present anymore she is with me and always will be. I love you GG and I know you love me.